Truth My Kids Will Know - Not Your School's Job

Lie # 12 - "Schools are responsible for the lives of their kids."

Here's a list of responsibilities that today's culture has laid at the feet of our schools:

-To make sure kids are fed well-enough.

-To make sure they are developing good social skills.

-To make sure they're learning how to behave correctly and are treating other people with kindness.

-To make sure they have access to their hobbies and activities.

Strangely, actual education is often WAY down the list. But what role should a school play in your family?

I have a unique perspective on this issue.

As a student, I was always homeschooled. My parents put a priority on my education, and believed they could provide me with a better start in life than what the schools around us could give at the time. And so - even at a time of strict truancy laws - my parents took on themselves the responsibility of what I learned. (They did it very well, I might add. All five of their kids were doing schoolwork that was whole grades ahead of other kids their age.)

Now, as a parent, my kids are enrolled in a fantastic local school district. So far, their teachers have been amazing in their roles, and my kids have flourished in their education. My wife and I know that this quality is often rare with public schools, and we waited a long time to find a home within this school district.

That being said, we have in no way just handed over our kids to the school. As great as it is, the school is NOT my child's third parent. (Actually, the fact that the faculty in our district understands this is probably why they're such a great school.) The school is our employee, hired by us specifically to teach our kids. And if, at any time, the school forgets that point and oversteps their bounds, they will be fired and we'll find another source of education.

You see, Jenn and I know the truth about this: We alone are responsible for our kids. The school does not share that responsibility.

One Job To Do...

I like that my kids can eat at school. I like that they can get involved in extra-curricular activities if they're interested in them. I like that their teachers touch on good behavior from time-to-time. I'm glad that they can learn social interaction with others in a relatively safe environment.

But those are bonuses to attending school...by no means should they be the primary focus. 

Even before the official founding of the United States as a country, the leaders of the colonies had the idea that life and freedom was directly tied to the quality of a person's education. They believed that an educated population - that could read, write, and communicate freely - would be much more difficult to oppress than people who were ignorant. 

And since freedom was the central idea of our founders, the idea of public education was naturally ingrained in the founding of our country. All families were encouraged (many times even required) to send their kids to a local school where they could learn to read and write, and also learn from history and classic literature. These were the legitimate responsibilities of the American Public School system.

There were no football teams.

There was no school lunch program.

There wasn't any "anti-bullying" campaign.

But these simple schools consistently produced the best-educated young adults in the world. Why? Because they understood what their focus should be - not indoctrination, not recreation, and not socialization; but simply education.

Their one job was to teach - and that was easily measured by what their students knew when they were done.

Could they read well enough to understand important books, documents, and opinions?

Could they write down their own thoughts and opinions well enough to be understood correctly?

Could they be responsible enough with basic math?

Did they have a proper understanding of past events in history?

If yes, then the school was successful. If no, then it considered a failure.

Then Who Is Responsible?

Can you imagine what it was like to have a school that only taught kids? What would it be like if the school didn't provide lunches, or buses, or social programs, or lessons in behavior? Whose responsibility would it be to take care of these kids? 

Surprisingly, the answer is the same today as it was then: It's the parent's job to raise their own kids.

For example:

Parents, it is your responsibility to make sure your kids have lunch. You can use the school as a resource if it's available, but don't pretend that they have to feed your kids. If they don't have the resources, then pack a lunch. If you have to ("gasp!") pay for your kid's meal, then add it into your budget.

We all agree that feeding kids is important! But do we have to keep pretending that the schools are the only ones that can do it?

Another example:

Parents, your kids hobbies are up to you. If your school provides both an education and these extra-curriculars, great! But if having both is not an option where you live, then make sure you prioritize reading and writing over balls and helmets. An adult will be better off if they learned math and grammar in school than if they only learned how to "play as a team".

And if these other hobbies are important enough to you, then find a way yourself. 

Maybe those statements sound harsh...but they're not intended to be. My ultimate goal would be to give your kids back to you. One of the most loving thing that society can do for any child is to recognize that their mom and dad - NOT a group of strangers on a school board - are responsible to raise them correctly. 

It's the parents that know what's best for their kids.

It's the parents that love their kids and want to see them grow up right.

It's the parents that have a personal (instead of institutional or ideological) interest in their kid's future.

And it's parents that can pass along life lessons, model the right behavior, and train up their children to become adults.

Are there parents that fail in this responsibility? Of course.

Is this a massive weight that rests on the shoulders of moms and dads? You bet!

Welcome to real family life, where the entire future of those little humans is now in your hands!

When the culture around my kids views their school as if it were ultimately responsible for them, they'll know this to be true: Their mom and dad are the only ones who are actually responsible for their well-being, and we're the ones that always have their best interests in mind!